HOSTAGE: Takes one to know one

 Women have a tendency to ask their female friends for relationship advice or help decoding their guys. Come on, ladies, we’ve all done it. But I have come to realize that the best advice in figuring out your guy really comes from other guys. Think Jack Berger, when he joins Carrie and the other Sex and the City girls at a club, telling Miranda the painful — and much needed — truth that sparked a bestselling book and movie: “He’s just not that into you.”

If only every girl had a Berger.

This weekend, my friend June called to vent about her boyfriend troubles. Her on-again, off-again boyfriend James, with whom she’s been ‘on’ for six months, had been giving her trouble about her upcoming birthday. What she really wanted was to go to the beach. He didn’t seem that into it.

Then, the day before her birthday, June calls James after work. He ignores her call. Twice. When he finally responds, it’s by text message. The message of the message? He’s with two female friends at the movies. Furthermore, James had asked her before if she would pay for him to go midnight bowling. June said even if his friend Kylie got him in for free because she works there, he definitely spent money on snacks. It didn’t add up.

I haven’t heard from her since that — except I know via Facebook that they ended up going to the beach — but I have heard the opinions of the two men in my life. My dad and Chris are both in consensus that James should be dumped. He’s clearly mistreating June, they said. And Chris added that he would never, ever go out to the movies with another girl and even if he did, he would answer his phone because his girlfriend comes first.

This is not the first sign of trouble I’ve seen in June’s relationship and while I have continually supported her and James, I’m beginning to believe that maybe he’s just not right for her after all. Because while women also have the tendency to be constantly supportive of their friends, sometimes that “yes” should really be a “no,” and no, I don’t believe that June deserves to be treated this way.

This post appeared on HOSTAGE Magazine's blog today.